Schoolhouse Hill (1969 ed.), Chapter 1
Next: Schoolhouse Hill (1969 ed.), Chapter 2
It was not much short of fifty years ago—and a frosty morning. Up the nakedⒶalteration in the MS long slant of Schoolhouse Hill the boys and girls of Petersburg village were struggling from various directions against the fierce wind, and making slow and difficult progress. The wind was not the only hindrance, nor the worst; the slope was steel-clad in frozen snow, and the foothold offered was far from trustworthy. Every now and then a boy who had almost gained the schoolhouse stepped out with too much confidence, thinking himself safe, lost his footing, struck upon his back and went skimmingⒶalteration in the MS down the hill behind his freed sled, the straggling schoolmates scrambling out of his way and applauding as he sailed by; and in a few seconds he was at the bottom with all his work to do over again. But this was fun; fun for the boy, fun for the witnesses, fun all around; for boys and girls are ignorant and do not know trouble when they see it.
Sid Sawyer, the good boy, the model boy, the cautious boy, did not lose his footing. He brought no sled, he chose his steps with care, and he arrived in safety. Tom Sawyer brought his sled and he, also,Ⓐalteration in the MS arrived without adventure, for Huck Finn was along to help, although he was not a member of the school in these days; he merely came in order to be with Tom until school “took in.” Henry [begin page 176] Bascom arrived safely, too—Henry Bascom the new boy of last year, whose papa was a “nigger” trader and rich; a mean boy, he was, and proud of his clothes, and he had a play-slaughterhouse at home, with all the equipment, in little, of a regular slaughterhouse, and in it he slaughtered puppies and kittens exactly as beeves were done to death down at the “Point;” and he was this year's school-bully, and was dreaded and flattered by the timid and the weak and disliked by everybody. He arrived safely because his slave-boy Jake helped him up the hill and drew his sled for him; and it wasn't a home-made sled but a “store” sled, and was painted, and had iron-tyred runners, and came fromⒶalteration in the MS St.Ⓐemendation Louis, and was the only store-sled in the village.
All the twenty-five or thirtyⒶalteration in the MS boys and girls arrived at last, red and panting, and still cold, notwithstanding their yarn comforters and mufflers and mittens; and the girls flocked into the little schoolhouse and the boys packed themselves together in the shelter ofⒶalteration in the MS its lee.
It was noticed now that a new boy was present, and this was a matter of extraordinary interest, for a new boy in the village was a rarer sight than a new comet in the sky. He was apparently about fifteen; his clothes were neat and tasty aboveⒶalteration in the MS the common, he had a good and winning face, and he was surpassingly handsome—handsome beyond imagination! His eyes were deep and rich and beautiful, and there was a modesty and dignityⒶalteration in the MS and grace and graciousness and charm about him which some of the boys, with a pleased surprise, recognised at once as familiar—they had encountered it in books about fairy-tale princesⒶalteration in the MS and that sort. They stared at him with a trying backwoods frankness, but he was tranquil and did not seem troubled by it. After looking him over, Henry Bascom pushed forward in front of the others and began in an insolent tone to question him:Ⓐalteration in the MS
“Who are you? What's your name?”
The boy slowly shook his head, as if meaning by that that he did not understand.
“Do you hear? Answer up!”
Another slow shake.
“Answer up, I tell you, or I'll make you!”
[begin page 177]Tom Sawyer said—
“That's no way, Henry Bascom—it's against the rules. If you want your fuss, and can't wait till recess, which is regular,Ⓐalteration in the MS go at it right and fair; put a chip on your shoulder and dare him to knock it off.”
“All right; he's got to fight, and fight now,Ⓐalteration in the MS whether he answers or not; and I'm not particular about how it's got at.” He put a flake of ice on his shoulder and said, “There—knock it off if you dare!”
The boy looked inquiringly from face to face, and Tom stepped up and answered by signs. He touched the boy's right hand, then flipped off the ice with his own, put itⒶalteration in the MS back in its place, and indicated that that was what the boy must do. The lad smiled, put out his hand, andⒶalteration in the MS touched the ice with his finger. Bascom launchedⒶalteration in the MS a blow at his faceⒶalteration in the MS which seemed to miss; the energy of it made BascomⒶalteration in the MS slip on the ice, and he departed on his back for the bottom of the hill, with cordial laughter and mock applause from the boys to cheer his way.
The bell began to ring, and the littleⒶalteration in the MS crowd swarmed into the schoolhouse and hurried to their places. The stranger found a seat apart, and was at once a target for the wondering eyes and eager whisperings of the girls. School now “began.” Archibald Ferguson, the old Scotch schoolmaster, rapped upon his desk with his ruler, rose upon his dais and stood, with his hands together, and said “Let us pray.” After the prayer there was a hymn, then the buzz of study began, and the multiplication class was called up. It recited, up toⒶalteration in the MS “twelve times twelve;” then the arithmetic class followed and exposed its slates to much censure and little commendation; next cameⒶalteration in the MS the grammar class of parsing parrots, who knew everything about grammar except how to utilize its rules in common speech.
“Spelling class!” The schoolmaster's wandering eye nowⒶalteration in the MS fell upon the new boy, and he countermanded that order. “Hm—a stranger? Who is it? What is your name, my boy?”
The lad rose and bowed, and said—
“Pardon, monsieur—je ne comprends pas.”
Ferguson looked astonished and pleased, and said, in French—
“Ah, French—how pleasant! It is the first time I have heard that tongue in many years. I am the only person in this village who [begin page 178] speaks it. You are very welcome; I shall be glad to renew my practice.Ⓐalteration in the MS You speak no English?”
“Not a word, sir.”
“You must try to learn it.”
“Gladly, sir.”
“It is your purpose to attend my school regularly?”
“If I may have the privilege, sir.”
“That is well. Take English only, for the present. The grammar has about thirty rules. It will be necessary to learn them by heart.”
“I already know them, sir, but I do not know what the words mean.”
“What is it you say? You know the rules of the grammar, and yet don't know English? How can that be? When did you learn them?”
“I heard your grammar class recite the rules before entering upon the rest of their lesson.”
The teacher looked over his glasses at the boy a while, in a puzzled way, then said—
“If you know no English words, how did you know it was a grammar lesson?”
“From similarities to the French—like the word grammar itself.”
“True! You have a headpiece! You will soon get the rules by heart.”
“I know them by heart, sir.”
“Impossible! You are speaking extravagantly; you do not know what you are saying.”
The boy bowed respectfully, resumed his upright position, and said nothing. The teacher felt rebuked, and said gently—
“I should not have spoken so, and am sorry. Overlook it, my boy; recite me a rule of grammar—as well as you can—never mind the mistakes.”
The boy began with the first rule and went along with his task quite simply and comfortably, dropping rule after rule unmutilated from his lips, while the teacher and the school sat with parted lips and suspended breath, listening in mute wonder. At the finish the boy bowed again, and stood, waiting. Ferguson sat silent a moment or two in his great chair, then said—Ⓐalteration in the MS
[begin page 179]“On your honor—those rules were wholly unknown to you when you came into this house?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Upon my word I believe you, on the veracity that is written in your face.Ⓐalteration in the MS No—I don't—I can't. It is beyond the reach of belief. A memory like that—an ear for pronunciation like that, is of course im—why, no one in the earth has such a memory as that!”
The boy bowed, and said nothing. Again the old Scot felt rebuked, and said—
“Of course I don't mean—I don't really mean—er—tell me: if you could prove in some way that you have never until now—for instance, if you could repeat other things which you have heard here. Will you try?”
With engaging simplicity and serenity, and with apparently no intention of being funny, the boy began on the arithmetic lesson, and faithfully put into his report everything the teacher had said and everything the pupils had said, and imitated the voices and style of all concerned—as follows:Ⓐalteration in the MS
“Well, I give you my word it's enough to drive a man back to the land of his fathers, and make him hide his head in the charitable heather and never more give out that he can teach the race! Five slates—five of the chiefest intelligences in the school—and look at them! Scots wha hae wi' Wallace bled—Harry Slater! Yes, sir. Since when, is it, that 17, and 45, and 68 and 21 make 155, ye unspeakable creature? I—I—if you please, sir, Sally Fitch hunched me and I reckon it made me make a figure 9 when I was intending to make a— There's not a 9 in the sum, you blockheadⒶalteration in the MS!—and ye'll get a black mark for the lieⒶalteration in the MS you'veⒶalteration in the MS told; a foolish lie,Ⓐalteration in the MS ill wrought and clumsy in the invention; you have no talent—stick to the truth. Becky Thatcher! Yes, sir, please. Make the curtsy over again, and do it better. Yes, sir. Lower, still! Yes, sir.Ⓐalteration in the MS Very good. Now I'll just ask youⒶalteration in the MS how you make out that 58 from 156 leaves 43? If you please, sir, I subtracted the 8 from the 6, which leaves—which leaves—I think it leaves 3—and then— Peace! ye banks and braes o' bonny Doon but it's a rare answer and a credit to my patient teaching! Jack Stillson! Yes, sir. Straighten up, and don't d-r-a-w-l [begin page 180] like that—it's a fatigue to hear ye! And what have you been setting down here: If a horse travel 96 feet in 4 seconds and two-tenths of a second, how much will a barrel of mackerel cost when potatoes are 22 cents a bushel? Answer—eleven dollars and forty-six cents. You incurable ass, don't you see that ye've mixed three questions into one? The gaudsⒶalteration in the MS and vanities o' learning! Oh, here's a hand, my trusty fere, and gie's a hand o' thine, and we'll—out of my sight, ye maundering idiot!—”
The show was become unendurable. The boy had forgotten not a word, nor a tone, nor a look, nor a gesture, nor any shade or trifle of detail—he was letter-perfect, and the house could shut its eyes anywhere in the performanceⒶalteration in the MS and know which individual was being imitated. The boy's deep gravity and sincerity made the exhibition more and more trying the longer he went on. For a time, in decorous, disciplined and heroicⒶalteration in the MS silence,Ⓐalteration in the MS house and teacher sat bursting to laugh,Ⓐalteration in the MS with the tears running down, the regulationsⒶalteration in the MS requiring noiseless proprietyⒶalteration in the MS and solemnity; but when the stranger recited the answer to the triple sum and then put his hands together and raised his despairing eyes toward heaven in exact imitation of Mr. Ferguson's manner, the teacher's face broke up; and with that concessionⒶalteration in the MS the house letⒶalteration in the MS go with a crash and laughed its fill thenceforth.Ⓐalteration in the MS But the boy went tranquilly on and on, unheeding the screams and throes and explosions, clear to the finish; then made his bow and straightened upⒶalteration in the MS and stood, bland and waiting.
It took some time to quiet the school;Ⓐalteration in the MS then Mr. Ferguson said—
“It is the most extraordinary thing I have seen in my life. In this world there is not another talent like yours, lad; be grateful for it, and for the noble modesty with which you bear about such a treasure. How long would you be able to keep in your memory the things which you have been uttering?”
“I cannot forget anything that I see or hear, sir.”
“At all?”
“No, sir.”
“It seems incredible—just impossible. Let me experiment a little —for the pure joy of it. Take my English-French dictionary and sit down and study it while I go on with the school's exercises. Shall you be disturbed by us?“
[begin page 181]“No, sir.”
He took the dictionary and began to skim the pages swiftly, one after another. Evidently he dwelt uponⒶalteration in the MS no page, but merely gave it a lick from top to bottomⒶalteration in the MS with his eye and turned it over. The school-work rambled on after a fashion, but it consisted of blunders, mainly, for the fascinated eyes and mindsⒶalteration in the MS of school and teacher were oftener on the young stranger than elsewhere. At the end of twenty minutesⒶalteration in the MS the boy laid the book down. Mr. Ferguson noticed this, and said, with a touch of disappointment in his tone—
“I am sorry. I saw that it did not interest you.”
The boy rose and said—Ⓐalteration in the MS
“Oh, sir, on the contrary!” This in French; then in English, “I have now the words of your language, but the forms not—perhaps, how you call?—the pronunciation also.”
“You have the words?Ⓐalteration in the MS How many of the words do you know?”
“All, sir.”
“No—no—there are 645 octavo pages—Ⓐalteration in the MSyou couldn't have examined a tenth of them inⒶalteration in the MS this short time. A page in two seconds?—it is impossible.”Ⓐalteration in the MS
The boy bowed respectfully, and saidⒶalteration in the MS nothing.
“There—I am in fault again. I shall learn of you—courtesy. Give me the book. Begin. Recite—recite!”
It was another miracle. The boy poured out, in a rushing stream, the words, the definitions, the accompanying illustrative phrases and sentences, the signs indicating the parts of speech—everything; he skipped nothing, he put in all the details, and he even got the pronunciations substantially right, since it was a pronouncing-dictionary. Teacher and school sat in a soundless and motionless spell of awe and admiration, unconscious of the flight of time, unconscious of everything but the beautiful stranger and his stupendous performance. After a long while the juggler interrupted his recitation to say—in rather cumbrous and booky English—
“It is of necessity—what you call ‘of course,’ n'est-ce pasⒶemendation?—that I now am enabledⒶalteration in the MS to apply the machinery of the rules of the grammar, since the meanings of the words which constitute them wereⒶalteration in the MS become my possession—” Here he stopped, quoted the violated rule, corrected his sentence, then went on: “And it is of course that [begin page 182] I now understand the languages—language—appropriated to the lesson of arithmetic—yet not all, the dictionary being in the offensive. As for example, to-wit, ‘Scots wha hae wi’ Wallace bled, Sally Fitch hunched me, ye banks and braesⒶalteration in the MS o' bonny Doon, oh here's a hand my trusty fere and gie's a hand o' thine.' Some of these words are by mischance omitted from the dictionary, and thereby results confusion. Without knowledge of the signification of hunched one is ignorant of the nature of the explanationⒶalteration in the MS preferred by the mademoiselle ThatcherⒶtextual note; and if one shall not know what a Doon is, and whether it is a financial bank or other that is involved, one is still yet again at a loss.”
Silence. The master roused himself as if from a dream, and lifted his hands and said—
“It is not a parrot—it thinks! Boy, ye are a marvel! With listening an hour and studying half as long, you have learned the English language. You are the only person in America that knows all its words.Ⓐalteration in the MS Let it rest, where it is—the construction will come of itself.Ⓐalteration in the MS Take up the Latin, now, and the Greek, and short-hand writing,Ⓐalteration in the MS and the mathematics. Here are the books. You shall have thirty minutes to each. Then your education will be complete. But tell me! How do you manage these things? What is your method? You do not read the page, you only skim it down with your eye, as one wipes a column of sums from a slate. You understand my English?”
“Yes, master—perfectly. I have no method—meaning I have no mystery. I see what is on the page—that is all.”
“But you see it at a glance.”
“But is not the particulars of the page—” He stopped to apply the rule and correct the sentence: “are not the particulars of the page the same as the particulars of the school? I see all the pupils at once; do I not know, then, how each is dressed, and his attitude and expression, and the color of his eyes and hair, and the length of his nose, and if his shoes are tied or not? Why shall I glance twice?”
Margaret Stover, over in the corner, drew her untied shoe backⒶalteration in the MS out of sight.
“Ah, well, I have seen no one else who could individualize a [begin page 183] thousand details with one sweep of the two eyes. Maybe the eyes of the admirable creature the dragon-fly can do it, but that is another matter—he has twelve thousand, and so the haulⒶalteration in the MS he makes with his multitudinous glance is a thing within reason and comprehension. Get at your Latin, lad.” Then with a sigh,Ⓐalteration in the MS “We will proceed with our poor dull ploddings.”
The boy took up the book and began to turn the pages, much as if he were carefully counting them. The school glanced with an evil joy at Henry Bascom, and was pleased to note that he was not happy. He was the only Latin pupil in the school, and his pride in this distinction was a thing through which his mates were made to endure much suffering.
The school droned and buzzed along, with the bulk of its mind and its interest not on its work but fixed in envy and discouragement upon the new scholar. At the end of half an hour it saw him lay down his Latin book and take up the Greek; it glanced contentedly at Henry Bascom, and a satisfied murmur dribbled down the benches. In turn the Greek and the mathematics were mastered, thenⒶalteration in the MS “The New Short-Hand Method, called Phonography” wasⒶalteration in the MS taken up. But the phonographic study was short-lived—it lasted but a minute and twenty seconds; then the boy played with several other books.Ⓐalteration in the MS The master noticed this, and by and by said—Ⓐalteration in the MS
“So soon done with the Phonography?”Ⓐalteration in the MS
“It is only a set of compact and simple principles, sir. They are applicable with ease and certainty—like the principles of the mathematics. Also, the examplesⒶalteration in the MS assist; innumerable combinations of English words are given, and the vowels eliminated. It is admirable, this system, for precision and clarity; one could write Greek and Latin with it, makingⒶalteration in the MS word-combinations with the vowels excised, and still be understood.”
“Your English is improving by leaps and bounds, my boy.”
“Yes, sir. I have been reading these English books. They have furnished me the forms of the language—the moulds in which it is cast—the idioms.”
“I am past wondering!Ⓐalteration in the MS I think there is no miracle that a mind like [begin page 184] this cannot do. Pray go to the blackboard and let me see what GreekⒶalteration in the MS may look like in phonographic word-combinationsⒶalteration in the MS with the vowel-signs left out. I will read some passages.”
The boy took the chalk, and the trial began. The master read very slowly; then a little faster; then faster still; then as fast as he could. The boy kept up, without apparent difficulty. Then the master threw in Latin sentences, English sentences, French ones, and now and then a hardy problem from Euclid to be ciphered out. The boy was competent, all the while.
“It is amazing, my child, amazing—stupefying! Do me one more miracle, and I strike my flag.Ⓐalteration in the MS Here is a page of columns of figures. Add them up. I have seen the famous lightning-calculator do it in threeⒶalteration in the MS minutes and a quarter, and I know the answer. I will hold the watch. Beat him!”
The boy glanced at the page, made his bow and said,—
“The total is 4,865,493Ⓐalteration in the MS if the blurredⒶalteration in the MS twenty-third figure in the fifth column is a 9; if it is a 7, the total is less by 2.”
“Right, and he is beaten by incredible odds; butⒶalteration in the MS you hadn't time to even see the blurred figure, let alone note its place. Wait till I find it—the twenty-third, did you say? Here it is, but I can't tell which it is—it may be a 9, it may be a 7. But no matter, one of your answers is right, according to which name we give the figure. Dear me, can my watch be right? It is long past the noon recess, and everybody has forgotten his dinner. In my thirty years of school-teaching experience thisⒶalteration in the MS has not happened before. Truly it is a day of miracles. Children, we dull moles are in no condition to further plod and grub after the excitements and bewilderments of this intellectual conflagration—school is dismissed. My wonderful scholar, tell me your name.”
The school crowded forward in a body to devourⒶalteration in the MS the stranger at close quarters with their envying eyes; all except Bascom, who remained apart and sulked.
“Quarante-quatre, sir.Ⓔexplanatory note Forty-four.”
“Why—why—that is only a number, you know,Ⓐalteration in the MS not a name.”
The boy bowed. The master dropped the subject.
“When did you arrive in our town?”
[begin page 185]“Last night, sir.”
“Have you friends or relatives among us?”
“No, sir—none. Mr. Hotchkiss allows me to lodge in his house.”
“You will find the Hotchkisses good people, excellent people. Had you introductions to them?”
“No, sir.”
“You see I am curious; but we are all that, in this monotonous little place, and we mean no harm. How did you make them understand what you wanted?”
“Through my signs and their compassion. It was cold, and I was a stranger.”
“Good—good—and well stated, without waste of words. It describes the Hotchkisses; it's a whole biography. Whence did you come—and how?”
Forty-four bowed. The master said, affably—
“It was another indiscretion—you will not remember it against —no, I mean you will forget it, in consid— what I am trying to say is, that you will overlook it—that is it,Ⓐalteration in the MS overlook it. I am glad you are come, grateful that you are come.”
“I thank you—thank you deeply, sir.”
“My official character requires that I precede you in leaving this houseⒶalteration in the MS, therefore I do it. This is an apology. Adieu.”
“Adieu, my master.”
The school made way, and the old gentleman marched out between the ranks with a grave dignity proper to his official state.
A further possibility is suggested in a newspaper letter entitled “A Mystery,” probably written in 1868 to “EDS. HERALD” (clipping in MTP). Complaining of a deadbeat “Double” who had been writing squibs and borrowing money in his name, Mark Twain concludes: “I am fading, still fading. Shortly, if my distress of mind continues, there may be only four of us left. (That is a joke, and it naturally takes the melancholy tint of my own feelings. I will explain it: I am Twain, which is two; my Double is Double-Twain, which is four more; four and two are six; two from six leaves four. It is very sad.)” Thus, in a punning non-mathematical sense, 44 might be Twain twice doubled.
|None of these explanations, however, seems wholly adequate. On the basis of present evidence I conclude that the number and name “44” indicate simply that “Satan's original host have large families,” as the author says in his working notes for “Schoolhouse Hill.”